PugPuggy and My Feet

One of PugPuggy's favorite things to do is carry a toy or stick over to my feet, put the toy or stick on my feet and then chew it. Sometimes, she will leave the toy or stick on my feet and run off. I don't understand what is so appealing about my feet. Maybe she views my feet as a plate. Maybe she needs some leverage for her chewing. Maybe she is pretending to eat me while she chews her toys. I don't know.

It has become so frequent that I no longer pay attention to this behavior. I had forgotten about this behavior until it showed up in our photographs.

Look at the stick on my feet in this picture of PugPuggy. She put it on my feet.


PugPuggy also likes to lick my toes. Again, I am dumbfounded by her behavior.

She is weird, but I like her that way.

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #27

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"crazy woman"

Today's Picture:


I don't know what is happening in this picture (or what is about to happen), but I am pretty sure I could be friends with this person.

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!

Rules

Iron Man at the Alamo Drafthouse

I won!

Last week I made an iron man costume for a promotion at the Alamo & aintItCool.com. I found out that I won tickets to the advanced screening. The best part of the advanced screening was 1) being with friends I had not seen in a while and 2) the pre-show with the Jet Pack guy. He literally flew about 40 feet in the air.

Seeing Iron Man for free was great enough by itself. But Tim League of the Alamo and Harry Knowles of aintItCool.com made it even better by finding a real-life Iron Man.

The Jet Pack was so LOUD! It was also mildly scary. When he landed, he kicked gravel and dirt. I could not watch him the entire time because I was covering my eyes from the dirt & gravel flying into my face. My friends Les, Jodi & Owen were with me. Jodi & Owen are expecting a baby. When the Jet Pack guy was flying, they both had the same reaction of "protect the unborn baby". They quickly scooted away from the barrier. I was trying to take photos while the chaos was happening. Here are a few of my shots. Some of these are off-centered. Please forgive me, I was staring into the sun, trying to hold my ears closed and take pictures at the same time.

Check-out how high this guy got.


This is Jet Pack Guy landing... a pretty cool shot if I do say so myself.


Finally, I dorked-out and had my picture taken with Jet Pack Guy.

I have a goofy look on my face. I am pointing at him as if someone just said to me, "who is your hero?" My answer as expressed by the photo above, "this guy". Seriously, that guy has the coolest job. He gets to fly in a Jet Pack. How sweet is that? I bet he is almost deaf by now. That Jet Pack was SO LOUD!

Here is a picture of Tim League, owner of the Alamo, MC-ing the event:



It was an awesome night, capped by drinks with the one and only Les.

In summary: Iron Man rocked, the Jet Pack guy has the coolest job, thank-you Tim League and Harry Knowles for making this happen.

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #26

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"super dork"

Today's Picture:


I am mildly surprised a picture of me in an Iron Man costume did not appear. I was reading the description of this watch and it said, "The Nixon Men's Metal Dork Watch makes being a super dork pretty cool..The Dork Watch features a simple digital module display, date indicator, and a steel metal flex band. It's so freakin' cool, Nixon gave it the most ironic name they could think of. That's not to imply it isn't as smart as that tech weenie in your math class—the Dork literally tells you the time with custom voice alarms courtesy of Tony Hawk, Saxton Boucher, and other surprise guests. Simply set the alarm, and these guys will tell you when it's time to get moving. Perhaps not surprisingly, the Dork is relatively un-athletic and is afraid of water. *Available for US shipment only"

There was a reviewer who said he had to change the watch battery 16 times in a year. He had to change it this often because the voice drains the battery. It says "dork" every hour on the hour. Crazy, eh?

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!



Rules

The Professional

I watched the director's cut of "The Professional" this weekend with some friends. I had not seen it since it was in the theaters. It had been a long time. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed this movie. I also forgot how much I loved this movie. Gary Oldman was creepy as the corrupt DEA agent. Jean Reno was brilliant as the assassin. Harvard graduate Natalie Portman was excellent as the seductively confused teenager.

My favorite Natalie Portman work is this sketch from Saturday Night Live.

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #25

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"super excited"

Today's Picture:


I feel like I know this baby. I definitely know how this baby feels... I am going to Iron Man tonight. So, I am "super excited". I should have also looked for "super geek"... maybe tomorrow?

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!

Rules

Jamie Quirk - Former Kansas City Royal of the Week

This is another entry in the "Former Kansas City Royal of the Week".

Growing up, I loved Jamie Quirk. I played baseball most every summer... the problem was that I rarely played. I was a bench warmer. I think a couple of things prevented me from playing:

• I could not hit the baseball
• I could not catch the baseball
• I never really wanted to hit or catch the baseball
• I stepped and threw with the same foot, an unorthodox ed technique that never caught-on professionally (despite my lobbying)
  
• I would often close my eyes when trying to catch a pop-fly
• if someone yelled, "HEY BATTA, BATTA, BATTA" while I was at the plate, I would often leave the batting box and say, "what?!!! ...what do you want?!!!"
• I had a Cabbage Patch Kid
  
• I wore my stirrups on my arms
  

Where as most kids growing up in the '80s in Kansas City, Kansas, wanted to be George Brett. Not me... I wanted to be Jamie Quirk. At the time (1985-ish), Jamie Quirk was a third string catcher for the Kansas City Royals. He was a bench warmer, like me.

My childhood best friend, Kirk Duckers, & I began worshiping the unsung heroes of professional baseball: the bench warmers.

Kirk & I would bring the baseball cards of these unknown players to the dugout and make little shrines to them while the other kids were in the field. We stopped short of lighting candles in the cinder-block dugouts.

Since Kirk & I never played, we brought a checkers board to the game. We once brought binoculars to the game. We were sitting on the bench, looking at our friends in the outfield through binoculars, saying things like "he looks HUGE through these things". We would try to follow the ball leaving the pitcher's hand to the catcher's mitt through binoculars. Our coach yelled at us once because the guys in the field were laughing at our antics on the bench.

We were bored out of our minds.

I imagine Jamie Quirk never brought binoculars to a game when he was sitting behind Jim Sundberg and John Wathan. Nor did he play checkers with Greg Pryor.

Jamie Quirk turned out OK. With 43 home runs, Quirk has hit the most roundtrippers in Major League history by any player whose surname begins with the letter "Q." Cool, eh? Currently, he is a pitching coach for the Colorado Rockies.

Jamie Quirk was my baseball-player-hero in the 1980s. My favorite player of all time: Mel Bunch (this paragraph is for Erik Schullstrom).

A Toast (yes, I am drinking at work)! To Jamie Quirk! The Ben-Bartley-Former-Kansas-City-Royal of the Week!

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #24

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"crazy man"

Today's Picture:


I am glad it did not return a picture of me in an Iron Man costume.

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!



Rules

Happy Birthday, Megan

Megan Bayles Bartley, my wife (& best-girlfriend), is celebrating a birthday. A lady never reveals her age... fortunately, I am not a lady... Megan is 31-years-young today.

Megan & I met at a co-ed softball game in Louisville, Kentucky. I was playing, Megan was in the stands. We had mutual friends & connected immediately. The first thing Megan ever said to me was, "is that an Arizona hat you are wearing?"

Megan knew it was an Arizona hat because she had lived in Tucson, Arizona, where I went to college. Although we never lived in Tucson at the same time, we both have ties to the University of Arizona. Megan worked there, I worked\went to school there. Megan's parents moved to Tucson after leaving Seattle (where Megan grew up and went to UW).

The odds of me meeting Megan were pretty remote. Considering where we grew up, where we lived and our backgrounds, there was such a small chance of our lives intersecting. The different places we lived\worked before we met (Megan - Seattle, Tucson, Phoenix, Louisville; me - St. Louis, Kansas City, Tucson, Raleigh, Louisville, Austin, Japan) made it unlikely our paths would cross.

But I am sure glad our paths crossed.

Megan - I will never forget dancing with you at our wedding. Happy Birthday & I love you.

I. AM. IRON MAN.

Before you read this, let's establish one thing: I am a geek. I love being a geek. I am not changing for anyone.

Disclaimer now finished, you may continue reading.

I am excited about the new Robert Downey Jr. & Terrance Howard movie entitled Iron Man. It will not be released for a couple of months. However, the good people at the Alamo Drafthouse and the one-and-only Harry from AintItCoolNews.com are teaming-up to give us a special free sneak-preview of Iron Man. Not only are they showing a free sneak preview of the movie, but they are having a real guy flying around the movie theater in a jet pack. HOW SWEET IS THAT?!!!

Here is some video of the guy in the jet pack:


There is one big catch: there is a competition to get these free tickets. The competition is basically that you have to take a picture of yourself dressed as either Iron Man or Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.'s character in the movie).

So last night, to Megan's mild entertainment, I made my Iron Man costume for the competition. Here is my Iron Man costume:


And here is my Iron Man costume in the dark:


Fun to make? You know it. Funny? In a sad way, yes. Creepy? Hell yes.

However, in my own Ben-Bartley-geek-world, I rock.

Here is how I made it:

• the shoulder pads are an upside-down storage container
• the chest light is a touch light (Home Depot)
• the arm guards are plastic pictures (Goodwill)
• the red clothes are small pajamas (Goodwill)
• the yellow parts are tape (Hobby Lobby)
• the face mask was bought (Hobby Lobby)
• the helmet is left over from previous projects (Top Gun - Be Kind Rewind competition)
• the boots & shin guards were found around the house

Not unlike the government, I covered everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) in red tape (Big Lots).

I think that is the key to being a Super-Hero: cover everything in red tape & shop at the Goodwill.

I will find out by Friday if I was a winner. Wish me luck.

In summary: the Alamo Drafthouse, AintItCoolNews.com & Iron Man all rock; the key to being a super-hero... cover everything in red tape; I am a geek.

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #23

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"David Letterman"

Today's Picture:


I missed this episode. I think I heard about it, but I did not see it.

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!



Rules

Happy Birthday Mom

Happy Birthday, Mom!

I hope you are having a wonderful birthday. I wish I could be there to celebrate with you.

I really appreciate everything you have done for me. I could not possibly list everything you have done for me. I could not even list all the highlights from my life in which you were involved. But here is the list I came up with off the top of my head:

• visited Megan, PugPuggy & I in Austin in 2008
• celebrated my marriage to Megan with me in 2004
• toured Ireland & England with me in 2002
• supported my crazy decision to move to Japan in 2001
• vacationed on the East Coast with me in 1998
• celebrated with me when Arizona won the National Championship in basketball in 1997
• moved me to Arizona in 1993
• helped me graduate early from Bishop Ward in 1993
• did not kill me when I got suspended from Bishop Ward in 1992 (sorry, again)
• moved me from St. Pat's to St. Peter's in 1986
• took me to my first concert (Ronnie Milsap) in 1983 (I think it was 1983)
• moved me from DeSoto to Kansas City in 1982 (I think it was '82, right?)
• took me to Iowa to see the Pope in 1979
• carried me around for 9 months in 1974

This is less than .001% of what you have done for me. Above is a list of big events from my life. But the things I appreciate the most are the day-to-day things you did (and are doing) for me:

• you fed me
• you clothed me
• you gave me a safe & loving home ...even after I should have moved out :)
  
• you taught me how to treat strangers
• you taught me how to treat family
• you demonstrated the importance of education
• you instilled values
• you are patient with me
• you love me

Again, that is only a partial list of things you have done\are doing for me. I appreciate everything you have done (and are doing) for me. Thank you.

I miss you. I love you. I am proud you are my mom.

Happy Birthday, mom. Go celebrate.

Movie Trivia - April 23rd - Pulp Fiction

John Travolta plays Vincent Vega in the movie Pulp Fiction. In the movie, Vincent Vega drives a 1964 Chevelle Malibu convertible. In real life, the 1964 Chevelle Malibu convertible belonged to Quentin Tarantino. Unfortunately, the car was stolen during the production of the film.

That car was beautiful. Thieves suck.

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #22

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"insane in the membrane"

Today's Picture:


Interesting.

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!

Rules

Chicken, Alaska - Small Town of the Week!

Congratulations to Chicken, Alaska! You are the first ever recipient of the Ben Bartley Small Town of the Week Award!

Chicken, you may be asking yourself, "what did I do to deserve this honor?"

The answer: you exist. I like your name. It made me happy to know you exist.

From your homepage, I learned that "Downtown Chicken has a bar, giftshop, cafe, and salmon bake. If you arrive in the morning, try some of Sue's famous Cinnamon Rolls -these things are incredible."

I also learned that in order to get to Chicken, Alaska, I have to take the Taylor Highway. According to your website "The Taylor Highway is made of packed gravel. Trucks, cars, and motorhomes regularly travel the road. The highway is open from Spring to early Fall. Paving is expected in the same year that pigs begin to fly."

Why do they call it Chicken? Your website told me:

"In the late 1800's, early miners traveled far in search of gold. Food was sometimes scarce, but a particular area near the South Fork of the 40-Mile River was abundant in Ptarmigan, now the state bird which bears a resemblance to a chicken. The miners kept themselves alive with the help of the Ptarmigan.

In 1902, Chicken was to become incorporated, the second town in Alaska to do so. The name "Ptarmigan" was suggested. Many people liked the name, but felt the quotation marks were too presumptuous. The name was shortened to Ptarmigan.

The only problem was that nobody could agree on the correct spelling. They didn't want their town name to be the source of ridicule and laughter, so they decided on "Chicken." (The irony is thicker than the foreshadowing.) "

Chicken, Alaska: the first ever Ben-Bartley-Small-Town-of-the-Week!

Bearded Ben

During my trip to Australia, I let my facial hair grow. Actually, I was too lazy to shave.

After 14 days of not-shaving, this is what I looked like:

I call this look, "Lost-in-the-Wilderness Ben".

Here is a picture of "Goatee Ben":



Here is "Four-Score-and-7-Years-Ago-I-Got-Shot-In-A-Theater Ben""

aka "Lincoln Ben"
aka "Penny Ben"

Here is "Thin-Beard-Ben". I call this look the "Schully":

I also call this look the "I Just Got A Job As A Bouncer".

Finally, here is "Normal Ben".

I use the word "normal" very loosely.

In summary: Ben was shot in a theater, Erik Schullstrom is a bouncer, facial hair itches.

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!

Rules

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #21

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"goofy dog"

Today's Picture:


This dog does not look happy. Its body language suggests he is saying, "clearly my behavior is bad because they are making me wear this coat".

A Picture that Should Have Never Been Taken

Here is a picture that should have never been taken:


This is Megan & I in our "Stinger Suits". Basically, these are wet suits that protect you from jelly fish at the Great Barrier Reef.

I look like a Teletubby. Or maybe I am going to shark hunt with Steve Zissou. Or we could be members of the Jamaican bobsled team.

Google Image Search: Word & Picture #20

Here is how this works:
I put in a word into the Google image search.
I post the picture of the first thing that comes back.

Today's Word:
"Master Pancake"

Today's Picture:


This is awesome. This poster is from a Master Pancake show I did with John & Joe in Jacksonville, FL. We had a blast. It was by-far the best work trip ever. Jacksonville was such a cool town and I loved our hosts, Tim & Shana... I am not sure if I spelled Shana's name correctly. I am ashamed of my memory. I blame the copious amounts of alcohol I have consumed for my lack of memory.

Daily "Name This Person And Win!"

The first person who names the person in this picture wins a hug from Ben!!!

Rules

Blood Tea and Red String

I was introduced to a movie called "Blood Tea and Red String" last night. Brian Satterwhite introduced me to it. I associate the following words with it:

• unique
• cute
• disturbing
• unsettling
• curious
• creative
• heart warming

I can not say it was "good" or "bad"... it was unlike anything I have ever seen before. There were no words.

I am glad Brian introduced me to it. Had Brian not showed me it, I would have never seen it. Thank you, Brian.

3:11 AM

I woke up this morning at 3:11 AM. I am still adjusting to the US timezones. There was no hope for me going back to sleep. So I got out of bed, walked into the living room and who is laying on the couch? None other than the lovely Megan Bartley. She could not sleep either. Our dog, PugPuggy, was curled on her lap, snoring away.

At first, I was really sad that I woke up at shortly after 3. But when I saw Megan was awake, I was a little happier. Then Megan said something that she has never said before, "I am in the mood for IHOP." At 3:15 AM, Megan and I both wanted to go to the International House of Pancakes.

As we were driving there, I was trying to remember the last time I went to an IHOP. I think it was before I moved to Japan... about 8 years ago. I am not sure if this is true, but I vaguely remember going to an IHOP with Andre Meadows in the fall of 2000. I don't remember the occasion, but I vaguely remember Andre, Leah, Owen and some other people at an IHOP in North Austin.

Our VW Cabrio pulled into the IHOP parking lot at the same time as a mini-van. I was making bets with Megan on who was inside the mini-van. My first thought was drunk college kids. My second thought was seniors getting a jump on the day. It turned out I was wrong: it was 2 guys who were clearly computer guys, working late undoubtedly due to some organizational deadline. Poor bastards. I have been there.

I ordered Stuffed Strawberry French Toast with a side of hash browns. Megan had the cinnamon roll french toast. It was yummy, we did not finish it all.

Our waitress also worked at a school. She taught in the day time and worked at IHOP during the morning shift. She had two jobs, one of which is a school teacher... God bless America. As GW put it, she is living a "uniquely American experience". I wanted to ask her about her back story. I wanted to know why she was working 2 jobs. I wanted to ask her how she stayed so upbeat and positive despite working all those hours. But it was too early and maybe she did not want to talk about it, so I did not get into it.

Nonetheless, I had a great breakfast at IHOP. It is now 6:15 AM. I am going to try to go back to sleep. But before I go to sleep, I just want to thank IHOP for being open 24 hours.

Thank you, IHOP.

Down Under, Done Over

I am back! Where did I go? Here:


Crazy, eh? I still can't believe it. Australia was awesome. I loved the people, the scenery, the animals, the accent, the public transportation in Sydney... it was fantastic.

I am sitting in LAX right now, waiting on my flight back to Austin. I have not shaved in almost 2 weeks. I am smelling nice right now.

Tonight, I pick up PugPuggy. Then I am going home and going to bed. I am very excited to sleep in my own bed.

I probably won't be back blogging regularly until next week. I will give a full update about the trip next week.

'til then,
Ben